Saturday, June 02, 2007

Weenie Greenie: ESPN Radio’s Mike Greenberg Gives Us All a Lesson in Arrogance

If it was ever in doubt before—and it certainly wasn’t to me—ESPN Radio’s Mike Greenberg officially entered the category of “weenie” this past Thursday morning. He also entered a few other categories as well, like “arrogant SOB,” “cheapskate,” and let’s throw in “insensitive, presumptuous boob” while we’re at it. I suppose he also enters the category of “stupid guy,” for telling the story that exposed his own self for the supercilious phony that he is.

With great relish, Greenberg told his sub-normal-IQ sidekick Mike Golic the tale of arriving in his Washington, D.C., hotel room—both were in the Nation’s Capital to cover the national spelling bee—only to discover that he must have left his credit card in his taxicab. Greenberg fretted and then considered calling his credit card company to cancel the card—having assumed the worst, of course.

Later, he received a phone call from the hotel front desk, and then was connected to the taxi driver himself, calling to say that he was at the airport and had found Greenberg’s credit card, and that he would return it to him as soon as possible.

A half hour later, there’s a knock on Greenberg’s door and it’s the cabbie, with the credit card. At this point during the on-air radio exchange, Goonie Golic ventured that he assumed that Greenie threw the cabbie a tip for making the extra run, suggesting a $20 bill.

Here’s where it gets ugly: Greenie then launched into a completely bogus rationale, how it never occurred to him to give the cabbie a tip, and that, furthermore, this was an opportunity for the cabbie to share in the “good karma” that comes with being honest.

I don’t know which airport the cabbie was coming from, Reagan National or BWI or Dulles, but it hardly matters. Cab drivers are working men. I know. I drove a cab for four years in the Chicago area from 1995-99. It was one of the most eye-opening experiences I ever had, but I can tell you this for sure: Most cab drivers are amazingly decent and very human people. The stories of how each of them—men and women alike—have come to drive their taxis are consistently interesting, and sometimes inspiring. Cab drivers are ex-Vietnam vets, and former convicts trying to get straight, and otherwise guys and gals trying to figure out their lives just like everybody else. The cabbie experience unites them with humanity. They see it all, they put up with a lot of crap, and 99% of the time they do their jobs diligently and with as much honor as they can, especially given that society—and arrogant SOBs like Greenberg—generally categorize them as semi-lovable losers. This despite the fact that cab drivers are killed on city streets with as much frequency as police officers.

But back to Greenberg’s non-tip. Cabbies are working men, and their time—and gas—is money. Any sensitive human being with half a brain would know this, and that cabbie deserved money for his time and effort. It’s a total no-brainer. Not to mention the hassle Greenberg was saved by not having to cancel his credit card and go through getting a new account number.

Here’s what we know about Greenberg, since he’s such a bigmouth on his radio show, constantly relating his precious personal life on a daily basis (as if everyone wanted to know): He seems to come from an upscale New York home. He attended Northwestern University outside of Chicago. It’s not a cheap school. In fact, it’s a very expensive school, and sons who come from rich families—guys like Greenberg—go there. After graduation, Greenberg hooked up with local Chicago sports radio, and then weenied his way into the ESPN fraternity. He apparently lives with his perfect young family in a large, spacious home—Golic refers to it on-air—and he likes to remind his listeners that he doesn’t do blue-collar stuff. Greenie wants us to know that he’s the “eggheaded” kinda sports guy—all knowledge and subtle insight, of the type that eludes Goonie Golic. (Well, of that there is no doubt, but that’s not saying anything. Golic can hardly stammer successfully.)

So I guess if you’re an arrogant, ambitious New York type like Greenberg, you probably look down on cab drivers. You probably think they are lowly scum, and hence it would never even occur to you to compensate someone like that for their extra effort on your behalf. Because people like that, well, they’re just not in Greenberg’s caste. And why, after all, would he even think to part with some of his money just because the cabbie was “doing his job”?

Duhhhh...because I suspect that Greenberg wouldn’t know a hardship if it bit him in the ass. He lives a cushy, moneyed life, gabbing on the radio about sports, but just as often engaging in his own self-promotion, mainly because his ego is out of control, and, as this real-life incident exemplifies, he hasn’t a clue about what most people in this country must go through in order to maintain even a lower-middle-class life-style.

More telling is the fact that Greenberg shared the anecdote on-air, knowing that the tale would culminate with his insensitivity and stinginess. But then why would that matter if you’re totally unaware of what a cretin you are?

Good move, Greenie. On all fronts. Score one for arrogance. Then subtract about a million from the human kindness scale.

Jerk.

41 comments:

Anonymous said...

Before the end of the show, they admitted he had actually given the cabbie a tip, and the story was just for the sake of telling a story.

Anonymous said...

Greenberg sucks. Why does no one else see that it is a conflict of interest for him to offer his opinions on sports matters.
His mannerisms and way of speaking are terrible and ESPN is shoving these 2 blowhards down are throats.

Golic is just dumb. He picked Vinatieri to be MVP of the last SB. and that the colts would score 31 Pts.

Anonymous said...

He gave the guy a tip jackass... You clear have issues with a certain class of people, and chose to take it out on Greenberg.

Anonymous said...

Greenberg is an annoying little bitch. His stories are typical exposures of his own arrogance and cluelessness; I'm sure that in his own secret moments, Golic would just as soon kick his ass.

Anonymous said...

greenberg gave the guy a tip you moron. and i will also bet that you dont have that terrible of a life either. write about something people care about, or something thats TRUE! dont just write about someone who is more succesful than you in the media

Anonymous said...

every sports radio talk show host in the country is a nobody from nowhere and thats exactly what greenberg is. However he is just more successful then the rest beacuse he was hired by ESPN instead of some stupid lowlife sports talk radio show in the middle of nowhere.

Anonymous said...

Wow, there are a lot of haters out there. Do you listen to Mike and Mike for their insight into sports? The show is good because it is entertainment. Mike and Mike are good at what they do and that is to give a little info on sports and entertain. If it's too much for your superior intellect, tune out. Don't be a hater.

Anonymous said...

If you don't find Greenberg & Golic entertaining, at least mildly, then you're probably insufferable. I'm so glad I don't know you.

Anonymous said...

You obviously don't have that big a problem with Greenberg, or else you wouldn't listen to the program. You're just making a big deal out of nothing. Which is rather fun and entertaining i admit, but making a big deal out of nothing is exactly what mike and mike do. So in reality, you are not so different from mike greenberg as you thought. Maybe you should reevaluate. You do know this blog is #3 on Google's list of "espn greenberg golic" searches.

Anonymous said...

If you don't like them, don't listen. You're obviously a bitter little bitch who doesn't like people that have better lives than you, so quit your whining and learn to do something good for yourself rather than bringing down people who have had a luckier set of life situatons than you have.

Anonymous said...

Life sucks for you doesn't it. I'm truly sorry you didn't get the job. Why not cry a little more and try to make someone fill sorry for you.

Anonymous said...

ESPN is shoving these 2 blowhards down are throats.

Learn English.

And do you really have nothing better to write about? You should go back to driving a cab. At least you were relevant then.

Anonymous said...

hahaha.. the guy that wrote this drove cabs.

Anonymous said...

Whomever wrote this is a bitter coward, he bashes someone he knows nothing about and trys to attack someone else's life because he isn't as successful as HE feels HE should be. It is truly pathetic.... This person most likely has a drinking problem and touches little girls.....see how stupid i just sounded making wild accusations about someone I've never even spoken to?

Anonymous said...

I like the show because it is entertaining and informative. Greenberg is a weenie so what who cares he does a great job along with Golic. If you don't like the show tune out.

Anonymous said...

I would check your facts, he definitely gave him a tip. If you don't like what either of them say, then don't listen, and don't complain. Golic has a little more insight in to sports than any of us, seeing as how he played professional sports. I think you should take your overly-large ego (thinking Greenberg looks down on people and thinking you are better than him) somewhere else and show someone else your idiocy.

Anonymous said...

I find it funny that people who don't like Mike and mike are compelled to read this and then comment on it. I don't read about things I don't like and have nothing to say. They are entertaining, and like most high paid people in the world some of the "little" guys never occur to them, much the same way that certain people expect to be tipped for their work, in this case he did tip him, but why should it be expected? I have found peoples wallets before and have turned them in without expecting a tip or reward on the merit that someone else would do the same for me. You sound like another one of these greedy service workers of America. If you despise what you are doing then change what you are doing. Don't be a hater, cause that's what you sound like, and stay off of pages that you don't care for personally

Anonymous said...

Basically arguing the point of a tip or not a tip isn't the issue, its how Greenberg, looks down on cabbies. Let me remind you Greenberg is a man that can't even use public bathrooms. Does this really surprise you? Arrogance seems to be apart of all espn broadcasting if you haven't noticed.

Mike and Mike Rule's said...

Give me a break!! If you don't like Greenie and think Golic is stupid turn your radio or TV off. I can't stand people who don't like a show or a TV host yet all they seem to do is watch them and complain about them. I guess you have no life without Mike and Mike... otherwise what would you have to blog about... opps sorry BITCH about. GET A LIFE. I love Greenie and Golic.

Anonymous said...

hey bud you are a douche bag, mike and mike are the best in talk sports radio!!! why dont you go listen to rush limbaugh and bash some people for things that they dont even do. you want to talk about arrogance, only and arrogant jackass like yourself would post a blog about something that happened once, (and he did tip the guy). another thing if you ever actually listened to the show you would hear how greeny constantly slights himself on how inept he is. so im just curious are you next going to bash our troops overseas because you disagree with the war??? opinions are like a$$holes sir everyone has one, and apparently yours is bigger than the rest!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm with most people here. Why listen if you can't stand the show? Secondly, you're point that Greenberg is just lucky that ESPN hired him and not some local show is absurd. ESPN hired him because of his talent and ability to rile up diverse opinions... like this blog and everyone's counterpoints. ESPN is shoving these 2 down everyone's throat.. and they will keep doing it as long as people keep watching... which is exactly what's happening.

Anonymous said...

Greenberg is cool, if you dont like them then your a fool,,, you stupid phucker!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

your profile picture makes you look like a woman, imo

Anonymous said...

Get over it, you bitter ex-cab driver.

Anonymous said...

Wow, the only arrogant SOB is the writer of this article. If you listened to the whole story, you would have heard that he was just joking and actually gave the cab driver a generous tip.

Anonymous said...

Greenberg sucks. Neither of them have an opinion on any subject matter, they just want to suck up to today's modern athlete.

Anonymous said...

I can't count how many times both of them will say "Not that either side is right or wrong but..."

Take a fucking stand, have an opinion. Tell us which side you think is wrong.

Anonymous said...

the author of this passage is a faggot. he is a beat ass writer who just wrote a page and a half on a successful man's side stories. wow. he sucks.

Anonymous said...

While the lack of a tip was not a good thing it is a good show. The fact that they add the personal touch is a great part of there partnership. The last word you used on the rant "JERK" sure fits you to a tee, keep up the crappy work!

Anonymous said...

I love what that author wrote, especially about Greenberg. He truly is a wimpy bitch and his buddy Golic is not as funny as he thinks he is. The two of them think they're the best thing since sliced bread when in all actuality-they're crammed down your throat because they're part of ESPN. They're plastic, fake, and are NOT entertaining! I wish guys like Colin Cowherd would take over that spot. Bottom line-I do my best to tune out whenever those two goons are tuned in!

Anonymous said...

Greenberg is a typical Jew cheap bastard. No tip? What a poontang.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, Greenie's a weenie but it's clear from this columnn that you're a huge goober.

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Anonymous said...

Greenberg is the worst, listening to his voice makes my blood pressure go up. The show is corny and they cut to commercial every 5 minutes. The whole prototypical "smart-guy" and "jock" thing isn't funny, it is painfully awful. I also cannot stand that "Greeny" has to give everyone a gay little nickname (Adam Schefter "Shefty").

Frank Peterson said...

I listen every morning. I get up to date information on all my sports (minus hockey!) and get a laugh with how they present it. Greenberg is Greenberg and Golic is Golic...I don't try and analyze it. As a wise man once said "green jacket, gold jacket, who gives a sh*t".

Anonymous said...

Greenberg is such a douchebag

Unknown said...

Oh please... Everything he stated is a matter of fact. Merely tuning into the show validates what's written in this column (which is very good I might add). Jackass? Why do you resort to such asinine verbiage? I seldom watch this show any longer. I could care less about Greenberg's overbearing insistence of constantly bogging the show down with his wife, kids, Northwestern, his phobias, and just plain nauseating dribble that he somehow imagines the viewers are interested in. Oh, and lets not forget about the dandy on costume performing his dancing with the stars!! You want to use the term Jackass? Take your pick. mike & MIKE. Again, great article.....

Jeff Kilmer said...

I find Greenie a horrible host and is so full of himself that the mirror is his best friend. And I'm sick about hearing about his family! Talk sports and leave your wife and kids out of it!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I listen to the show every morning on podcast, at least until recently. I began to discover what the writer discusses about Greenberg;s characterization. I'm unsure how I didn't realize how cheesy the entire show is sooner, but he pegged Greenberg pretty much spot on. A few commenters have noted about listening to the show for "insight". I would beg for any insight from either, but I know mostly all I will earn for it is not so impressive ego massaging along with a large cup of non-opinions on sport's easiest/pointless subjects.

Anonymous said...

Golic has a sub-normal IQ? Hardly. A Notre Dame graduate. Only a pedestrian thinker - like Greenberg - would fail to see that Golic puts up a jovial facade.